20 July 2011

Lessons


Learned some very valuable lessons on friendship (and on relationships in general), today.

When you're heart is filled with love, there'd be no more room for pride. That hateful pride.

You know how we all go through those tampuhan blues with our friends. Whenever I feel slighted or hurt by someone dear to me, instead of letting the person know, I would resort to the cold shoulder treatment: that i'm-not-talking-to-you-figure-out-what-you've-done-and-better-make-it-up-to-me attitude. This infantile behavior, trust me, did not get things work out the way I wanted them to. No matter how petty the reason of the rift may be, when pride gets in the way, it could lead to something really damaging to a relationship. I have realized, it won't hurt at all to eat that humble pie and reach out first. At the end of the day, it would not even matter who made the first move to patch things up. You'd be too happy and relieved to even care.

Communication is very important.

It's really not too hard to talk to friends once you got pride out of the way. Open communication is vital to any relationship, I learned that lesson the hard way. Trust me, it's not a great feeling when you are not talking to your friends or loved ones. When you want to say something, talk to the person and not to others. Issues won't go away on their own and it would only complicate things if parties not concerned are brought into the picture.

Friendship means loyalty.

When your universe is crumbling down, and when entire the world seems to be against you, a loyal friend will make a big difference. Knowing someone is there who believes in you despite what everyone else is saying, staunchly defends you to their harsh judgment, that's what loyalty is all about. Simply being there for a friend in dire straits. Most important, even at times when you knew that the person is at the wrong side of the track, you are still there saying "hey I got your back". No, it does not mean tolerating the wrongdoings, but rather showing your friendship in the truest sense of the word.

Oh I knew these lessons by theory, I just did not notice that I was not applying them in real life. But hey, I'm a fast learner, but still a work in progress.

This piece, I dedicate to my bestest friends in the world. Thank you for the years of loyalty, steadfast love, forgiveness and acceptance. And to you two, thank you for these lessons. I learned them the hard way, but I think I'm going be an even more awesome friend from now on! :)