12 April 2011

Torrential Tears

I have always known that I am a bit of a crybaby. Well, maybe more than a little bit. The littlest things could send me in a sobbing frenzy - a sentimental TV ad, a romantic movie scene, a line from a book, a song, a heartfelt compliment. The list could go on. I am that pathetic. Even when upset, if I can't pour out my emotions, I cry.

I have been suppressing my emotions lately. Not sharing what's really running through my head and especially what's in my heart for fear of, well because of fear. Period. Probably, I am so used to keeping things that really matter inside that I find it so hard sharing them with other people. Or maybe, it's just so hard for me to trust. There are only a very few friends I can really open my heart to without the fear of being judged.

Yesterday, the dam broke. Nothing really dramatic, but once it started, it was difficult to stop. If someone asked me why, what happened, my answer would have been I don't know. I still don't have the answer. I still don't understand what I am going through. This confusion and the fear of not knowing what to do, most likely, are the culprits.

One of these days though, I'll finally have the answer. Once I get the courage to admit and face the truth. Only then will I understand.

:)

11 April 2011

Heavy Heart

I know they just wanted to have fun, and I know they did not mean any harm. But friends can sometimes be so pakialamera that they dont know they're already putting you in an embarrassing and compromising situation.

Rants.

My heart feels so heavy today, I want to cry my heart out. Must be all the stress and confusion I've been experiencing lately. Plus PMS.

I know I'm not making any sense and I don't care.

:((

10 April 2011

The One That Got Away

For the love that was almost there..




In another life, I would make you stay..
So I don't have to say that you're the one that got away.